Trying to get Mommy Arrested!!!

I know I'm being really dramatic with that title but I am so angry with my 10 year old right now, I've got to blog to keep my hands busy!!

While we were on break Maddy was bragging how she was getting really good at this game she was playing on one of her kiddie websites. I'm really good with keeping tabs on her computer activity and decided it was time to do a check using the parental controls. However, an odd thing occurred when I went to look at her daily activity....it came up empty!

Mind you, we were snowed in, on vacation, and she spent a lot of time on the computer all that week, so where was the history? It wasn't even showing her logging in! Hm? I did the typical mommy thing: Don't Say Anything, Catch Her In The Act...right?

Today she asked to go on the computer after doing all of her chores and I knew this was going to be the perfect time to catch her. I let her play for about 20 minutes then asked her to help with something downstairs. The minute she hit the bottom step, I was running up 2 at a time.

The first thing on the screen is the game she was talking about on pause...but...hiding behind it was an open hotmail account and a FACEBOOK page!!! I KNOW!!! She's 10!! How the @#%^$ did she get an email account and a Facebook page without the stupid parent control going crazy. And that's when I saw it. She wasn't signed on as herself. When we got our new computer we gave her the old computer with her own sign on and parental controls up the wahzoo. But...I never erased hubby's sign-on which had no password and no restrictions!! GASP!! CLUTCH YOUR PEARLS!!

After I got over that shock I took the liberty of browsing her FB page - EGADS!!! The cursing!! The stories of who's making out with who in the hallways! The "I can't believe so-and-so was such a bitch".....MY CHILD IS TEN YEARS OLD...HOW THE HELL ARE WE GOING TO MAKE IT TO HIGH SCHOOL???

You all know that you're supposed to be at least 16 to get on FB, well, honey, this child is attending Hofstra University, she was born in 1983, and she graduated high school with honors!!

The rage!!

MUST

GET

IT

ALL

OUT

TO

KEEP

FROM

SNATCHING

HER

OUT

HER

SLEEP!!!

When I finally confronted her, you know when you are so angry you're voice gets that almost eerie silence to it. She immediately started bawling as if I actually did put my hands on her. I made her watch me type this in her status:

"This is Madison's mom. Madison created this page without her parent's permission.

This page will be deleted today. I will be calling other parents!"

I deleted her account. Deleted her email account. Deleted hubby's sign-on. Changed all of her restrictions on the computer so that now she can only go online with my sign-on "permission". I then told her there was no more computer until I can trust her with it, and it will only be used now for school assignments. She had to shower and be in bed by 7:30. Screaming and crying the whole time like I went and found hubby's belt or something! The nerve!

I was stammering and stuttering in my angry calm so much because I really just had to rush her out of my sight. I did call one parent (had to keep my threat real) that told me "I despise that damn FB but I let her go on in small doses and then I use it as punishment". Seriously? If you hate it, why in the world would you allow your child on it?! It was like talking to someone who just wants their kid to be their friend. She informed me that the majority of the 5th graders have FB accounts, and I informed her that I would be calling the principal tomorrow!

Sidebar: Because Maddy is maybe 1 of the 5 ethnic kids in her entire grade (only about 20 in the entire middle school), my girlfriend swears it's the difference in how African-American kids are raised and how Caucasian kids are raised. These damn sneaky ass friends of hers! Ugh! All conspiring and happy about how cute it is to "act like teenagers LMAO"...Excuse ME?

Anyway, you all know how I feel about children on FB, now I have to go and let 'em know at the middle school.

I have to keep repeating that she's 10!! My mother says we need to just ship her sneaky ass to boarding school - Um, are you paying?

I've got 10 new gray hairs and an impending migraine now from suppressing the beatdown.

Here's the question: How old is old enough to be on FB, have a cell phone, have email?

Everyone's Back To School

With a few bumps along the way, we're all back to school. I, of course experienced the brunt of all those back to school bumps, starting with the back-to-school clothes shopping and then the shopping for school supplies with the gigantor supply list. I feel like the chick in the Staples commercial (you know where the son gets a kick out of showing his mom his growing supply list) only I didn't have an EASY button. Why do they keep getting longer?

I posted this on Mocha Manual:

The back to school supply list is, how can I put this? REE-DONK-U-LOUS!!! My 10 year old had a full backpack and a shopping bag to go to first day of school with, and this will be the first of maybe 3 trips of supplies! Like Really? Whatever happened to notebook, glue, scissor, eraser and everything else was supplied by school? I really miss the days of old - just showing up!!

Needless to say, Maddy got off to school just fine. I did forget to have the neighbors take her picture for me, but I saved the day by getting home just in the knick of time to catch her getting off the bus and a few shots in front the house. I thought maybe I was pushing it when she said to the neighbor, "Why does she always have to take pictures?" However, the question was met with flashes as she, too, was taking make-up pictures of her son. So there!

She had a great day, her only concern was that her friends told her she looked "punk" because of her outfit. I told her to stand by her eclectic clothing options, and the next time someone tries to put her in a category to just tell them, "This is MY style and I own it!" Of course, my neighbor and I both told her that her friends are probably just jealous. Shame on us, but it made her feel better!

Linky's day started off with him screaming, pulling me back outside and telling me, "No, Mama, no!" as I tried to drop him off to daycare. As usual, I'm crying on my way to work, and of course he's fine by the time I'm in the car, but still! He was ecstatic when I went to pick him up, that was the best part. Having him run to me and scream my name. Give him a few days and he won't want to come home.

My day? Well, it's the same old usual BS when dealing with the DOE and crazy colleagues. I got screwed yet again out of an early schedule and will not be on my beloved 1-8 program but a 2-9. Which means I'll be getting out of class at the same time Maddy's bus will be dropping her off. So it will be 2 years of me not picking up my son or being there when my daughter gets off the bus. SUCKS SO BAD! Sigh.

Then shocker of the day, I'm switching guidance counselors. I've been with the same counselor for four years, and now I have to get used to someone new and switch homes (right next door, so far, I know), but I've got four years worth of senior and prom pictures to move, student art work, letters, copies of super senior diplomas, and this is just my wall I'm talking about. I have an entire desk to switch over and a file cabinet. It's going to be an extremely hectic day tomorrow. Thank goodness for modified bell schedules. I don't have to really worry about being done until Monday, but yikes, talk about a headache!

Oh, and I go to the gym today for my ZUMBA class and would you believe the instructor cut back her hours?!?! The nerve of her to want to further her education while I still have fat to lose!!

I continue to hope, pray, cross my fingers and toes that we'll hit the lottery and I can tell the DOE to...