Sunday, March 16, 2008

Funny comebacks to insensitive "baby" questions...

I got this off of a message board so I can't take credit for it, and many many thanks to the guy (yes, the husband of the couple wrote it, which makes me feel good to know that men, not just the women in these relationships have to deal with this issue)....

Next time someone asks you, "How come you don't have kids yets?" or "Don't you want kids?", you can answer with one of the following:
10. Well, my testicles don't work right. Want to feel them to see if you can feel the difference from normal testicles?
9. We're still waiting for next year's model to come out.
8. We've got three dogs, a couple cats, a parrot, and a ferret. Hang on... [Calling into other room] Honey? Is "Rusty" a golden retriever or a boy? [After a brief look of contemplation] I guess it's probably two dogs, because Rusty might be our son.
7. Y'know, I've been meaning to ask someone. Can you tell me where all these parents are getting theirs? We just can't seem to figure out where the babies are coming from.
6. We had some, but the chupacabra took them.
5. We want to, but we can't get over how gross sex is.
4. What's your favorite sexual position? Oh, I'm sorry, I thought it was "Inappropriately Personal Question Time".
3. We're tempted, but we're too afraid they'll turn out like yours.
2. I'm not really comfortable answering that question until I can consult the registered sex offenders list for this area. How do you spell your last name again?
And my number one fantasized reply...
1. We've had several, but we gave them all away to infertile couples because it seems unfair that they can't have their own. That must be hell. I mean, can you imagine?

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Haha... I'm gonna remember those!!! I get so sick of people asking!!! Thanks!