Back to Work Blues

I know, I know, I know! As a teacher, I don't get any sympathy when I complain that I have to go back to work after having 10 days off for Spring Break.

The first part of my break was wrecked by my overwhelming sadness. Therapy just confirmed that I am depressed. The rain ruined most of the free outdoor activities I had planned for the kiddies. Then all the family stuff got crammed into the past 3 days, so I didn't feel worse about crying in bed for the first 3 days of break.

Sigh.

The minute we walked back into the house from our day trip to the Intrepid, this sense of dread and sadness washed back over me. I literally sat on hubby's lap and had myself a quick cry. I have so much stuff to do the minute I walk into work tomorrow, it's making me nauseas:

• Proposal for assistance and support with my program
• Get tickets and program printed for my open mic show (annual event that I award a scholarship for)
• Report Card grades
• Practice, practice, practice for the show
• Prep for our next program trip
• Figure out what the hell I'm going to teach for the next 6 weeks
• sigh, sigh, sigh, sigh

Lord, I am grateful for having a job. I'm just so overwhelmed with it.

Everyone's Back To School

With a few bumps along the way, we're all back to school. I, of course experienced the brunt of all those back to school bumps, starting with the back-to-school clothes shopping and then the shopping for school supplies with the gigantor supply list. I feel like the chick in the Staples commercial (you know where the son gets a kick out of showing his mom his growing supply list) only I didn't have an EASY button. Why do they keep getting longer?

I posted this on Mocha Manual:

The back to school supply list is, how can I put this? REE-DONK-U-LOUS!!! My 10 year old had a full backpack and a shopping bag to go to first day of school with, and this will be the first of maybe 3 trips of supplies! Like Really? Whatever happened to notebook, glue, scissor, eraser and everything else was supplied by school? I really miss the days of old - just showing up!!

Needless to say, Maddy got off to school just fine. I did forget to have the neighbors take her picture for me, but I saved the day by getting home just in the knick of time to catch her getting off the bus and a few shots in front the house. I thought maybe I was pushing it when she said to the neighbor, "Why does she always have to take pictures?" However, the question was met with flashes as she, too, was taking make-up pictures of her son. So there!

She had a great day, her only concern was that her friends told her she looked "punk" because of her outfit. I told her to stand by her eclectic clothing options, and the next time someone tries to put her in a category to just tell them, "This is MY style and I own it!" Of course, my neighbor and I both told her that her friends are probably just jealous. Shame on us, but it made her feel better!

Linky's day started off with him screaming, pulling me back outside and telling me, "No, Mama, no!" as I tried to drop him off to daycare. As usual, I'm crying on my way to work, and of course he's fine by the time I'm in the car, but still! He was ecstatic when I went to pick him up, that was the best part. Having him run to me and scream my name. Give him a few days and he won't want to come home.

My day? Well, it's the same old usual BS when dealing with the DOE and crazy colleagues. I got screwed yet again out of an early schedule and will not be on my beloved 1-8 program but a 2-9. Which means I'll be getting out of class at the same time Maddy's bus will be dropping her off. So it will be 2 years of me not picking up my son or being there when my daughter gets off the bus. SUCKS SO BAD! Sigh.

Then shocker of the day, I'm switching guidance counselors. I've been with the same counselor for four years, and now I have to get used to someone new and switch homes (right next door, so far, I know), but I've got four years worth of senior and prom pictures to move, student art work, letters, copies of super senior diplomas, and this is just my wall I'm talking about. I have an entire desk to switch over and a file cabinet. It's going to be an extremely hectic day tomorrow. Thank goodness for modified bell schedules. I don't have to really worry about being done until Monday, but yikes, talk about a headache!

Oh, and I go to the gym today for my ZUMBA class and would you believe the instructor cut back her hours?!?! The nerve of her to want to further her education while I still have fat to lose!!

I continue to hope, pray, cross my fingers and toes that we'll hit the lottery and I can tell the DOE to...

The Inevitable

Well, we've crunched the numbers, we've cut down on the shopping, hubby's put in extra extra overtime...but alas at the end of the day, it looks like I have to go back to work in September. I have cried so much this weekend, my head is killing me. The thing I'm going to miss more than words can explain are my morning seranades from 6am to 9am. My Linky Poo wakes us, snuggles up next to me for his morning nursing, and when he's done he sings. I put on Sesame Street and he chats and sings right along with them or he turns to me and kisses me and holds me face (sometimes he smacks, kicks and bites) but it's still our time that doesn't get duplicated any other time of the day. I don't want to lose that quality time or have some one...anyone...have those precious moments with him. Selfish? I don't care! I love me some Link!! And the idea of being surrounded again by pissy teenagers all day is sooooooo not appealling at this point in my life.

Don't know if I mentioned this but we made a little proposal to my mother for us to sell our house, move into her house in FL, hubby work one job while I stay home with the kids, and save a little money until she's ready to move her self. Do you know what she said, "Um, now I'm retired, I'm only staying in NY to help you guys with the kids. So while that's a great idea, if you move into my place, where the hell will I go?" GEEZ! So much for that idea! Which is what brought us back to plan B = Mommy goes back to work. This way Daddy can work just his night job, Nana will come over in the morning to help get Maddy on the bus, watch Linky so Daddy can sleep for a few hours when he gets in at 9:30am, and then Daddy will take over until Mommy gets home around 5:30-6 every evening. Not his ideal situation nor mine, considering he's going to be in charge of an infant alone for several hours for the first time in his entire life. But there are father's out there that do it every day, and had to learn just as he will what to do vs. what not to do.

Y'all need to pray for us...whew, it's about to be an interesting couple of months!